Boondockin the saints

It has been a few weeks, it has been a busy few weeks!

Anyway, life has proved to be interesting and more than expected. God definitely has different plans than we have for ourselves sometimes. I decided that if you are a regular reader of my blog i would share with you where I am at ths point in my life.

School is kickin my butt! It is difficult keeping up. I have had a lot on my plate.

Work is busy and busier by the day, since everyone has met their deductibles at the end of the year they have all their healthcare taken care of. So, I been runnin my butt off at work.

I been tryin to keep up with the other stuff on the side that I do socially, I would say, I have been muttling through. I am not being able to pour as much of myself into it as I have been. I still really love the stuff I get to do.

Speaking of met deductibles, I will be having surgery again for the 3rd time this year. If it were not for my sinus surgery i would not have met my deductible. So, I am having surgery again. I have a small hernia and a cyst on one of my testicles. I will have all of it taken care of and I should be pain free! =)

As for my year of love lessons, I am definitely still learning.

I would say that at this point I am very peaceful and am interested to see what I am supposed to learn. I will let you know.

I just figured I would let yall into daneK’s life at the present.

PeACe

daneK

Squash painted cuticles

Why do I always find myself in stages of childhood behavior?

Just recently, I found myself attempting to rekindle old friendships which were less me trying as the other parties.

Simply put I found myself, thinking of my own needs as opposed to the people I was/am friends with. This happened, that happened and it ended in once best friends not ever speaking, texting, messaging on fbook, etc. There were needless to say harsh feelings on both ends. I don’t know why this was, it just happened upon itself. It really bothered me for a while. Then, I just didn’t care, and felt that I had some right to deny these the opportunity for reconciliation. Our friendships will likely never be what they once were, but they are.

I could write forever, my regular readers know that. Though you should note that a chasm between you and another sibling in the faith, really does affect your relationship with God. It has affected mine. I always take waaaayyyyyy too long before I remedy any problem I see about myself. Likely due to the fact that no one is ever around to tell me I am wrong. By the grace of God, He teaches me Himself, through situations and experiences. In these experiences my love and desire for closeness with Him grows even stronger…

It seems that lately forgiveness has been a real lesson of love. Love forgives!

I still don’t know how I can attempt to do what I want and unconsciously sabotage my own desires through my many failures and struggles, but I do. I also know that I have already learned that love forgives this year. =/

I guess I didn’t really learn it, otherwise I would not have had to learn it again?

I have experienced God’s forgiveness and human forgiveness. Both are powerful! This was said to me:

“I don’t care if he wants me to love him or not, I am gonna love him even if he is a jerk to me…”

I feel like this is similar to how God loves us, it definitely does not fully describe His love, but whether you love Him or not, whether you act like a jerk, turn away from Him, are apathetic of His existence, He loves us no matter what! This is always an humbling thought. He forgave us of everything we have done, we do, and will do.

I will end with a song that has stuck with me today:

“We are His portion and He is our prize,
Drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes,
If grace is an ocean, we’re all sinking.
So Heaven meets earth like a sloppy wet kiss,
And my heart turns violently inside of my chest,
I don’t have time to maintain these regrets,
When I think about, the way…

He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Oh how He loves.
Yeah, He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves us,
Whoa! how He loves.” – David Crowder Band

I pray that you all can truly understand how He loves us, if we all did the world would be RADICALLY different!

PeACe

daneK